You say wait, and everyone waits. You'll never see that in CS:GO.
Hideo Kojima: "I bet you can't create a story that is more inane than my MGS story." Taro Yoko: "Hold my beer."
Let's just sweep this under the carpet and pretend it never happened ok?
Hunk of meat + large wrench = nailbat. Makes sense to me.
Story wraps up around the two-hour mark, right out of refund range. Classy.
Do drugs instead. You'll thank me later.
Especially recommended if you have friends. Which you probably don't.
What can change the nature of a man? Not this game, that's for sure.
I gave a guy a soda and he gave me his pants. One step closer to saving New York.
Are you kidding me? I wonder why they don't even have timers for making the next mouseclick.
I got this game for free. I want my free back.
What we learned from this game is that 1 is bigger than Infinite.
It's turned a good shooter into a cheap Borderlands ripoff with less self-awareness than a troll without a mirror.
I am a simple man, I see explosions I say good game.
The Most Wanted and Out Now sections of the frontpage have been expanded to feature 30 cool-looking games each instead of 15 because, as everyone should know by now, "videogeams are dieing!!1"
Expensive Payday 2 DLC. Play the first one if you must play either of them at all.
Standard Tales game mediocrity.
100% communism-free. Make Mars great again.
Told everyone I knew this game would flop. It didn't flop.
If you ever receive an email from your wife who has been missing for the last three years, don't answer it. But do play Resident Evil 7.
Like Tenchu without any of the interesting items or powers. Or level design. Or cool stealth kills. Or difficulty, etc.
It seemed like Mr. Freeze had won, but Batman's all patched up and better now.
Combat is as fluid as your tears will be, and the bosses are so good that you'll feel honored to be killed by them.
Doom was a huge step up from Wolfenstein — almost a proper game.
id, in short, was composed of a bunch of programmers with very little knowledge of videogames and essentially zero aesthetic sensibility — and that’s why id fans have always shared the same qualities.
In brief, if "Videogame Art" means "Great Videogames" (as I've already sort-of explained in my 'Can Games "be Art"' essay, and more fully elaborated in my 'Genealogy of "Art Games"'), then "Not Art" means "Not Great".
Better than Absolution but far inferior to Blood Money.
Plays basically like Nascar. You go around in circles until you have to fix stuff, all the while hoping you don't get killed by an angry hillbilly.
Bonus points for being the only game where I dreaded unlocking more items because of the added complexity they would bring.
It looks, feels and runs like a mobile game.
It's a game that isn't a game that's trying to be more than a game. And fails. Also Phil Fish made it.
Wherein I try to convince myself I'm as stealthy as a ninja as I reload my save for the 60th time.
This game made me realize that god is real, and he hates us all.
Thank you, but I already have a job.
A very educational game that teaches you the concept of false advertising, as well as the consequences of pre-ordering videogames. "Indie" messages strike back!
A thought-provoking and poignant narrative experience that fully explores what it means to smash a demon's skull with his own foot.
Over 500 puzzles? More like one puzzle 500 times.
One of the prettiest videogames ever... but still a Final Fantasy.
The future of the adventure game is here.
Excellent stealth mechanics and a decent free-roaming implementation are marred by uneven mission design and the crappiest story ever in an MGS game. Play it but don't expect miracles.
Sprawling, bloated, offensively easy and worse than its predecessors, Witcher 3 is almost bad enough to have been made by Bethesda.
Just about as bad as any Bethesda game ever, and even slightly worse than its immediate predecessor, Fallout 4's lack of quality will not surprise anyone.
The problem is that neither Josh nor Recap offer any constructive criticism. The flaws they point out are there, but they say nothing about how to correct them, which really is the ultimate objective of criticism. Let's think about that then.
The "indie" scene continues its uncontested dominance of the walking-around-bland-environments simulator genre.
Somewhat inferior stealth and D-grade melodrama aside, this is a worthy sequel to 4A's franchise that targets graphics- and immersion whores.
A flawed but severely underrated addition to the venerable Biohazard saga that's great to co-op with a friend.
Insomnia: Toppling false idols since 2005.
What I am getting at is that adventure games sold themselves almost exclusively on the strengths of their aesthetics. The puzzles were merely there to detain you in the individual rooms for a little while so you could take the atmosphere in.
An expert fusion of Dead island, Mirror's Edge and Far Cry that provides an atmospheric, frenetic zombie experience not for the faint of heart.
The internet's definitive guide to the "independent" gaming scene.
Insomnia now has a PlayStation Community called "Insomnia Cult" which all current and past subscribers are warmly invited to join by posting their IDs in the PlayStation Network thread of the Online forum.
Insomnia now has an Xbox Club called "Insomnia Cult" which all current and past subscribers are warmly invited to join by posting their gamertags in the Xbox Live thread of the Online forum.
Saturdays starting at 5PM UTC and lasting between 5-15 hours is our main weekly VS MP time slot, primarily reserved for large games like PlanetSide and Planetary Annihilation, with the occasional For Honor or Dawn of War session while waiting for more people to show up. See you on Saturdays on Discord!
The Cult is looking to set up a presence in what looks like will be the best RTT ever when it lands in about five weeks time. Until then, join us as we prepare for it in Dawn of War II - Retribution!
The Cult is looking to expand its presence in the best 3D FTG ever. Join us and fight our enemies for honor!
The Cult is looking to expand its presence in the best RTS ever. Join us and planetarily annihilate our enemies!
The Cult is looking to expand its presence in the best versus multiplayer FPS ever. Join us and fight the good fight for the Republic!
Buy a ticket to E3 this Monday the 13th (while supplies last!) and join the Insomnia E3 crew on June 13-15 in LA. Post in the forum thread if you have an active account, or talk to recoil on the Discord server if you don't.
Join The Cult today and start streaming your favorite games for us to help us reach our goal of non-stop streaming 100% Hardcore Videogame Action 24/7/365.
Insomnia now has a Discord server. Drop by for a chat.
We are facing the new PA clan Angel's Court in a series of large team-based welcoming matches on Sunday the 25th at 9PM UTC and need as many players as we can get. Matches will also be streamed and posted on YouTube after. Whoever wants to play let icycalm know asap. As long as you have at least 20 hours in the game, you can play.
Insomnia now has a YouTube channel featuring highlights from the latest hardcore digital exploits of The Cult.
Insomnia now has a Twitch channel streaming the latest hardcore digital exploits of The Cult.
The Cult is Insomnia's official clan playing the coolest games in the best way possible (i.e. maximum player numbers, maximum difficulty settings, without continuing in arcade games, and so on), and we warmly invite all current and past subscribers to join.
Let's begin with the arcade territory. Let's finish: it's dead.
Desperate to find something, anything, to make themselves feel superior for not playing and enjoying a Call of Duty game, the “enlightened” gaming community at large goes through these games with a fine-toothed comb, until they can finally find something to either laugh at or condemn. Preferably both.
Go ahead, bring Nintendo down. If they wanted to stay in the race they should not have released a machine that's so weak it can be emulated on a toaster 48 hours after release.
It's curious how in the Occident the absurd theory that a videogame system is more important than the very videogames it runs has taken root.
But think of that moment, or virtually any hype moment in the game, and change your perspective from that of a spectator to that of a player. Do you really think having your super parried is hype, when it happens to you?
And then it finally happens, in a game with some nervous kid lashing out just because the start didn't go perfectly well, though we have ample chance to turn it around, I can't take it anymore, and I finally say something that starts with "fuck you idiot cunt".
What, a priori, sounded so promising to some, is turning, as they're leaking graphic material, into a new yankee absurdity.
Insomnia is offering subscriptions to all of Alex Kierkegaard's sites and copies to all his books to teenagers and college students with too much free time on their hands willing to post game news on the site on a semi-regular basis. Email JC Denton at admin [at] culture.vg for details.
This, if you ask me, summarizes the conundrum 3D fighters face today: they have played it safe for too long and it has caught up to them in a way that makes them an endangered species.
That Street Fighter abjures itself, its name, is not something that I say. Ono himself wanted to make quite clear — in more than one of those interviews for the North American media — that the saga had reached what — for him — was a dead-end.
The problem, ultimately, with sports games is that the theme is SET IN STONE and cannot under any circumstances be touched or fucked around with, otherwise your game will simply no longer be a sports game.
So shelve your Illuminati conspiracies, the reality is much more mundane and far less sinister than that.
Why you should never play a GTA with the mini-map on again.
Insomnia now has a Twitter feed serving sounds that bite from the world's leading videogame criticism and theory publication.
The highest level of immersion in art can indeed only be achieved when the player is motionless. So motion controls are by definition a dead-end, as it says in the title of the essay you've been reading.
In videogames, then, we want to AMPLIFY movement — that is our goal here. So that if I move my finger, Marcus Fenix cuts a Locust in half. We don't want to do the OPPOSITE, which is cut something in half in real life so that a few pixels on a screen will change color. How can you not see that that would be RETARDED?
As the completion of Alex Kierkegaard's Videogame Culture essays draws near, and the End of Videogame and Art Theory approaches, Insomnia inaugurates a space dedicated to those seeking answers to their remaining questions and clarifications.
What's extremely interesting, however... is that it's easier to believe in the reality of what your TV is showing, than in that of your computer game, even though the latter is, undoubtedly, a far more immersive medium than the former.
Because it's time we understood that emotions triggered by videogames can be so powerful that they become DANGEROUS to the person who's experiencing them.
Life is impoverished, it loses in interest, when the highest stake in the game of living, life itself, may not be risked.
Sony knows you're losers. Microsoft knows. That's why they offer you wine coolers and women dressed like Lara Croft. Because you're fucking dorks.
Insomnia now has a Facebook page connecting the world's leading videogame criticism and theory publication with the world's leading hardcore gamers.
Wherein Planetary Annihilation's premier competitive event is compared with the one Alex Kierkegaard is designing, and some important insights into the nature of videogames and art are arrived at and examined.
In an astonishing turn of irony, Kickstarter has proved, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that MULTINATIONAL CORPORATIONS ROUTINELY RISK FAR MORE AND INNOVATE IMMEASURABLY MORE THAN A RAGTAG RABBLE COMPOSED OF SICK, RESENTFUL COMMUNIST CHANDALAS.
Imagine the following: you're playing Hitman, you've got the sniper rifle, and you're heading to snipe the mark before he gets into his limo, when you realise the clocktower doesn't have wheelchair access.
Play games with me if you want, or don't. Either way, I am on a mission here, and I am not willing to jeopardize it in order to protect anyone's fragile feelings.
It all boils down to one reason: democracy.
Changing the aesthetics does not change the "Politically Incorrect" mechanics. It doesn't matter how many niggers you slap in World of Warcraft, it'll never be Utopia.
Because functional autonomy is put before ergonomics; ease of use, before experience; the Machine, before the Game.
Jaffe doesn't get it, and this affliction runs deep for many developers (and devoted fans): reviews aren't objective. The single criterion upon which a game is to be judged is whether or not the judge likes it. End of story.
In short, there is no longer the hardcore game to attract the hardcore gamer; good games are usually popular now, and popular games are usually good.
And that's why Nintendo has become irrelevant today. NOT because they fell out of the hardware race, but because they fell out of the ARTISTIC one...
Once per cycle, internet nerds feel they have enough audience to declare themselves "done" with gaming, or "done" with a company, or some other bold, yet inconsequential, proclamation.
Alex Kierkegaard explains why Roosh's new gaming site will in the long run prove worthless, but why you should support it nevertheless.
And the bottom line of this essay and of our theory of videogames with regards to these categories of games and methods of playing games is that we are interested in neither META- nor MINI-gaming, we are interested in GAMING, and all the rest are for fagets.
Alex Kierkegaard delivers the first and last word you'll ever need to hear on this sorry (non-)issue.
The Wii accumulated the absolute worst library of any major videogame console in history. It demonstrably, empirically has the most wretched, unplayable, unwanted, unsold roster of bargain bin fodder ever to be compiled for a major home game system.
That people are extremely timid.
And in all seriousness, the question must be asked — for it is time we asked it — that if these creatures reject some of mankind's greatest achievements, the hopes and dreams that it is precisely art's purpose to represent and glorify — if they reject mankind's dreams — in what way exactly, can they be said to be human?
Your game criticism is extraordinary and (assuming the videogame industry does not destroy itself) will no doubt go down in history as the only thing worth reading.
The so-called "metagame", as referred to by "competitive" gamers (which is to say by aspies), is merely a form of cheating. It consists of trawling FAQs, message boards and YouTube channels to learn of strategies which you are supposed to be DEVISING ON YOUR OWN BY PLAYING THE ACTUAL GAME.
April 27: Dawn of War III
May 5: Prey (2017)
May 16: The Surge
May 26: Rime
Spring 2017: Sudden Strike 4
August 22: Middle-earth: Shadow of War
TBA October: The Bard's Tale IV
Fall 2017: Red Dead Redemption 2
Q4 2017: Crackdown 3
Q4 2017: Dauntless
Late 2017: Divinity: Original Sin II
TBA 2017: Ace Combat 7
TBA 2017: Endless Space 2
TBA 2017: Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
TBA 2017: Metal Gear Survive
TBA 2017: Mount & Blade II: Bannerlord
TBA 2017: No Truce With The Furies
TBA 2018: Bloodstained
TBA 2018: Death Stranding
TBA 2018: Phoenix Point
TBA 2018: Pillars of Eternity II: Deadfire
TBA 2019: Wasteland 3
TBA: Cyberpunk 2077
TBA: Project Boundary
TBA: Project Octopath Traveler
TBA: Project Re Fantasy
TBA: Spider-Man PS4 (Working title)
TBA: System Shock 3
TBA: Tale of Ronin
TBA: The Last of Us Part II
TBA: The Universim
Vikings: Wolves of Midgard
Mass Effect: Andromeda
Zelda no Densetsu: Breath of the Wild
Horizon Zero Dawn
Halo Wars 2
Aoki Kakumei no Valkyria
Gravity Daze 2
Hitokui no Oowashi Trico
Killing Floor 2
Watch Dogs 2
Tiger Knight: Empire War
Gears of War 4
Forza Horizon 3
Master of Orion: Conquer the Stars
Deus Ex: Mankind Divided
Mighty No. 9
Mirror's Edge Catalyst
Edge of Nowhere
Total War: Warhammer
Homefront: The Revolution
Uncharted 4: A Thief's End
Ashes of the Singularity
Far Cry Primal
Homeworld: Deserts of Kharak