icycalm wrote:But you do not ever plan to play this game or any other MOBA or perhaps even any other game ever.
You are so very, very wrong here, and you have wronged me.
I've played
League of Legends for five hours and
Defense of the Ancients before that for another five. That's ten hours more than you have, which could easily be remedied if you weren't preoccupied with scouring out random forum posts to copy-paste to your frontpage instead of actually playing videogames.
Look at my achievements and tell me I don't play videogames.You haven't even played most of those games. And that's nothing on the countless DOS and legacy console games before my time I've played via emulation as well, since I've never owned a computer capable of running modern games. I've played games from every nation, genre, developer, and era that I can get my hands on. I've had accounts on Underground Gamer, bitGamer, and Gazelle. I've expended my parents' bandwidth caps numerous times by my excessive torrenting.
I play videogames. All I fucking do is play videogames. I will never aspire to anything else in my life apart from playing videogames. I play videogames seven or eight hours a day. I got
Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne in the mail yesterday, and played it eight hours until 3 AM, and for maximum autism I'm playing it with self-enforced Ironman so that when I got a Game Over three and a half hours in on a boss fight, I restarted and played it another four hours (over half of which was mindless grinding) to get past it. I also play
Far Cry 2 with permadeath, and I've probably played it more than you have, and I may never finish it but I don't care.
I spend all my money on videogames and food. I don't have a job, I don't have any friends, I made a fucking mess of education because instead of doing the assignments in my special day classes they put me in after a spontaneous satirical sketch they misconstrued as a safety threat... I would write out lists of the games I was currently playing. Over and over. Every Cave shooter emulated in MAME. All those pretty titles. It was some psychotic aspie shit, I tell you. I got kicked out of my parents house because instead of watching football with them, I would stay in my room playing videogames.
Here's an unwatchable video of me screaming at my parents for taking away my arcade stick and my friend's Xbox 360 so I couldn't play Mushihimesama Futari, so to retaliate I hooked up an NES and played Gradius instead.And that's nothing on the craigslist sex ads I've put up with titles such as "Suck me off while I play Gears of War 3." and "You play killer7 at my apartment while I do whatever I want." You wouldn't believe how popular my sex ads are, especially in South Africa.
You can rightfully denigrate every aspect of my character, if you must. You can call me an appalling, autistic, degenerate subhuman manchild shut-in. But you cannot say I don't play videogames. That is absolutely false, the most false statement one could conceivably make of me. At a glance you would know I play videogames, that that is all I'll ever amount to, that my epitaph ought to include my gamerscore in the header. That is before you pass out from the stench.
Last year, when I was still receiving government benefits for having autism (before they said it wasn't enough to prohibit me from keeping a job), I went and ordered a
GAEMS UNSC Vanguard Personal Gaming Environment. It's a portable TV briefcase to house my Xbox 360, so I could play it anywhere. I didn't have Internet access at home, so I got on Xbox Live by occupying college classrooms and filching their Ethernet ports, shutting the window blinds so I wouldn't be seen. I managed this way for several months. When they banned me from the campus, I would play in libraries and whisper over the headset, or I would set up at the local game store, which served as my second home.
Here are pictures of me and my Vanguard. I walked for literally dozens of miles with it and a backpack filled with supplies and games. It was my security blanket and it kept me some semblance of sane in that dire, desolate county.
I could go on forever. I could relate my entire life experience to videogames. In fact, there's nothing else to relate it to. I owe all my happiness to videogames, and my future is only videogames, of getting a job so that I can play
The Witcher III,
Call of Duty: Black Ops III, and
Bloodborne. I play videogames. I play them more than you do. Fuck you.