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Unread postby icycalm » 16 May 2014 05:00

At least no one is taking him seriously even in his own comments section. That's something.
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Unread postby icycalm » 21 May 2014 08:39

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Unread postby icycalm » 29 May 2014 23:54

Social commentary, Insomnia-style.

https://twitter.com/shubn/status/471702228299169792

shubn wrote:Maybe the reason people go out and shoot people in real life is because the majority of gore systems have sucked since Soldier of Fortune 2.
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Unread postby Some guy » 30 Jun 2014 16:55

sims2.jpg
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Unread postby icycalm » 02 Aug 2014 10:18

New Philadelphia GameStop Policy Requires Customer Fingerprints When Trading In Games
http://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2014/0 ... -in-games/

Pop-O-Matic wrote:Probably to help catch the dumbasses who bring in about 20 sealed copies of the new Calladooty to trade in on release week.


http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread. ... t123596030
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Unread postby Gaius » 26 Aug 2014 07:16

https://archive.moe/jp/thread/12329117/#12415307

Anonymous wrote:I really want to get behind Icycalm's paywall, will you kickstart me, /jp/?
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Unread postby earthboundtrev » 24 Sep 2014 07:27

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Unread postby Some guy » 30 Sep 2014 16:01

The funniest Steam Curator pages I've come across so far:

http://store.steampowered.com/curator/6 ... For-The-S/

Pretentious And Pointless Shit For The SJW In You recommends: "Emotionally driven games that will leave you in tears of joy"

Dear Esther
"A gripping tale of loss. Almost the Citizen Kane of video games. 9/10"

Offspring Fling!
"Great little gem, and I absolutely was not paid to make a recommendation of this game. Not at all."

Dragon Age: Origins
"I'm just glad I can be a gay PoC in this game."

Gone Home
"As a lesbian myself, Gone Home really resonated with me. I'm glad I didn't have to think too hard while playing this game. 10/10"

Depression Quest
"One of the most emotional experiences I've ever had while sitting at the computer. Goes fantastic with burgers and fries as well."


http://store.steampowered.com/curator/6 ... -Purchase/

Do Not Purchase recommends: "games that you should not buy"

Garry's Mod
"It's a good thing this game exists - it acts as a quarantine zone to contain bronies/autists, animal fetishists and power tripping children."

Sonic Adventure DX
"One day researchers will look back and wonder, "Where did the autism begin?" I think this game would be a good start to finding the answer."

Caster
"Drawing inspiration from such blockbusters as Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing and Jurassic Park: Trespasser, elecorn presents to you his magnum opus....."

NARUTO SHIPPUDEN: Ultimate Ninja STORM 3 Full Burst
"THIS GAME HAS A 1 HOUR CUTSCENE. WHY? This game would proably be ok if it was not Naruto but Naruto ruins everything it touches with its edgy darkness."

Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
"more like knights of +1 into the trashcan"

Rogue Legacy
"i didn't know "roguelike" meant "grinding adventure with no permadeath for the autistic community""

BioShock Infinite
"Do not buy this game unless you like collecting garbage for 10 hours while a bad, time-travel episode of Star Trek plays in the background."


http://store.steampowered.com/curator/6 ... fu-Hunter/

Waifu Hunter recommends: "I will tell you if a videogame has attractive anime ladies in it."

99 Spirits
"This game will give you 99 boners."

BioShock Infinite
"There's one garbage-tier waifu and then at the end there's suddenly like five or six of her? Who the hell wrote this game."

WAKFU
"Huge disappointment. I misread the game title and got really excited over nothing. Thanks a lot."

Mirror's Edge™
"You play as a girl in this game, and if you look down, you can look at your own boobs. Absolutely incredible."

Vanguard Princess
"An excellent game with lots of strong female characters. You owe it to yourself to experience this game, as well as the numerous pantyshots within."

Cho Dengeki Stryker All Ages Version
"Warning. This game is censored... that's pretty messed up, if you ask me! Don't allow Steam to destroy free speech, along with your right to anime tits."

Garry's Mod
"If you want to, you can download a Hatsune Miku model, and make a romantic date scenario with her. The future is already here."

Indie Game: The Movie
"While not actually an anime, I feel that Phil Fish has some serious yandere moé appeal to him that makes this OVA worth watching."

Manga Maker Comipo
"This game allows you to make your own waifu. The power is in your hands. Please use it responsibly!!"

Skullgirls
"You know a game has a lot of good anime ladies when the developers hire a porn artist to work for them. Excellent, in my opinion."
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Unread postby ksevcov » 05 Nov 2014 20:14

Tuffy the Corgi and the Tower of Bones, by Action Button Entertainment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o1jHV_Gpd8
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Unread postby icycalm » 05 Nov 2014 23:30

He has become the Yahtzee of game developers. Substituting comedy for competence in his craft.
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Unread postby icycalm » 06 Nov 2014 03:56

All the time he put into making that trailer, filming all those little scenes and doing all the editing etc., he could have put into making a second level.

But he's not interested in making a decent game, only in getting a little money and a few laughs out of a few people. So he makes mini-games whose best feature is, by far, the trailer. I.e. the exact same thing he and his ilk condemn the big companies for supposedly doing.
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Unread postby Some guy » 15 Nov 2014 03:44

Feds Spent $10 Million on a Video Game About Escaping a Fat Town
http://freebeacon.com/issues/feds-spent ... -fat-town/

Elizabeth Harrington wrote:The federal government has invested over $10 million developing and promoting a video game about a young teen that must escape a town full of fat people, as a method to fight obesity.

The National Institutes of Health (NIH) paid for the development of two video games that promote healthier eating, including “Escape from Diab,” a “nightmare” fictional city where people are only allowed to eat junk food.
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Unread postby Some guy » 20 Nov 2014 16:31

Book Report: Super Mario Bros. 3: Brick by Brick by MovieBob aka Bob Chipman
http://www.p4rgaming.com/book-report-su ... b-chipman/

Jack wrote:There is no happy ending in this book. The protagonist, Bob Chipman, is trapped in a world of delusion, escaping the difficulties of life through a virtual haze. This is his story.

readingisdead.png
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The book is described as a “journey through every step of the Super Mario Bros. 3 game” but that is a clever misdirect by the author to shield us from the true story. This book is not about Mario but about the character of Bob Chipman who is named after the author. In it, Chipman describes living in this world with Mario.

"Mario and I were “born” the same year, 1981 (I’m about 5 ½ months older,) and as such I don’t really remember a world without him."

The connection between him and Mario can be seen as a one-sided romance that resides in Mario’s world. We never grasp how Mario feels about Chipman but the book makes it very clear how Chipman feels about Mario. The actual image of the 8-bit Mario appears detail-less to us, but to Chipman, he fills in those details and creates an idol out of him.

"And there was Mario – chubby, clad in unassuming overalls and his preposterous mustache, looking for all the world like no hero of anything else that I’d ever seen."

The first sight of Mario’s world immediately entrances and consumes him. He says that he was “bad at school”, “zoned-out into daydreams” and “turned in a lot of poor work.” His initial description of Mario’s world is similar to the description of the character himself and he soon found himself “filling page after page of drawing paper with painstaking recreations of [...] that wide open world.”

This is where the story begins to take a darker turn. Most children would remember when they received their first video game console. Chipman doesn’t. But what he does remember is that his “young life now had a clear dividing line: pre- and post-NES.” It is here that we begin to see that Mario’s world is an escape for Chipman, a virtual safe haven where he is free to be himself.

"But the climactic reveal of SMB3 is burned – no, seared – into my memory the way JFK’s assassination was for my parents’ generation… or the way 9/11 would be for mine a scant 12 years from then…"

As he goes deeper and deeper into Mario’s world, we find that his connection to the real world grows weaker and weaker. The only time when he found himself “in sync” with the rest of the world was when “Mario peaked in the popular culture.” Outside forces like Sega with their mascot Sonic the Hedgehog would appear to him as if they were actual threats meant to be fought.

"In my memories, the Great Console Wars dragged on like my own private Vietnam, and it didn’t help that I was still constantly in trouble at school and in and out of therapy at the time for anger, attention and authority issues."

The breaking point comes when he realizes the real world manifestation of Mario is no longer meeting his imagination-fueled interpretation of him. When he realizes the game Yoshi’s Island reveals the birthplace of the Mario twins as the Mushroom Kingdom instead of Brooklyn, “the dissonance stuck with [him] for a while.” Real world distractions like the “social-hierarchy” prevented him from fully escaping into his delusion.

"For me, this was it. How much sense did it make to be trying to work out the bigger relationships between the characters and the broader scope of their world? [...] Why should I put so much of myself into this… when Mario’s masters couldn’t even keep his origins straight?"

When both Marios refused to merge into a singular entity for him, he makes the most dramatic change of his life to quit video games. Unfortunately, the side effects of this would not become apparent until years later. By not addressing the root causes of the problem, everyone in his family simply ignored them as he temporarily grew out of it. And soon, it would strike back in a horrific manner.

"GBA (and soon enough a DS) was my constant companion, particularly useful for passing time sitting in the car after work, waiting for the rest of the house to go to sleep before heading home. …I promise that last part isn’t actually as sad as it sounds."

Despite being told by his family to not show up while they are awake so they can not see the monster they have created, he does not question why he must do this as he has Mario’s world to escape into. At this point, he values Mario and his world far more than he does his family and will actively sing the praises of it. There is one final leap he must take until the real world is just a distant memory.

"I am the man I am for many reasons: because of my parents, my grandparents, my friends and family. But also because of Mario, whose adventures filled my lonelier hours, fueled my dreams, gave me a not-inconsequential sense of stability…"

This is where Chipman begins his journey through Super Mario Bros 3. He does this alongside keeping a journal in which he details real world events that occurred before slipping into the delusion world of Mario. The descriptions of each stage are both long and dull, exemplifying how raptured Chipman is about the whole thing while people in the real world grow tired of it.

"Right off the bat there’s a space where you can swim straight down to a hidden Question Block, but since the Power-Up turns out to be a Flower I don’t take it – I like being a Frog too much, and the added swim-control makes it that much easier to cope with the Bloopers (squids, making their first post-SMB1 appearance) waiting up ahead."

He relays the events between the real world and Mario’s world concurrently as if he wants them to converge. His normal routines also begin to show signs of delusion, for example, doing “a 3000 cal routine at the gym today thanks to the welcome distraction of a DVD full of old Transformers cartoons.” While a one-off line like this may seem innocuous, outsiders are watching an obese man watching children’s cartoons in public without a care in the world.

We begin to see how far he is taking this entry into Mario’s world when we hear that his grandmother was hospitalized. While he realizes that he is “coping with this and other uneasy aspects of my present-day life [by] playing a video-game,” he does not do anything about it. He lets it wash over him while the memories of his real life fade away as he talks more about the world of Mario 3.

"I woke up to a phone message from my mother informing me that [my grandmother] appeared to be in a “fading” state, and that people were advised to stop by and say… well, you get the idea. [...] I needed to get outside “the grid” of my familiar areas, and I needed to “happy up” (or at least clear my head) after that, and took the first course of action that entered my mind in that regard: My brother had raved recently about a retro-style video arcade…"

The world of Mario is not the only place he escapes to. As mentioned previously, Transformers is another childhood relic that he seems to hold onto and retro games also produce the same effect. All these things either allow him to escape the real world or ignore his immediate surroundings. It is only when his grandmother passes that he can no longer escape.

"I will miss her terribly. [...] All I’m sure of now is that for the first time since I started this project (maybe for the first time ever) I just don’t feel much like playing “Super Mario Bros 3.”

Unfortunately, like before, this effect is only temporary and he immediately regresses back to escaping inside the world of Mario 3. He “just [wants] to deal with it, get through it, grieve in [his] own way, and get back to living. [...] Part of which involves getting right back on the horse with this book.” It is only now that we realize that writing the book is only an excuse for him to go right back into playing Mario 3.

"In any case, fate provided a solution: on top of everything else, the air-conditioner in our home [...] finally gave up the ghost after years of erratic functionality. So, while the rest of the family was off to share grief in the manner of psychologically-healthy human beings, I was off to buy, set up and install a new AC. If nothing else, when we were all (inevitably) still sad later on, at least we weren’t also miserably hot and sweaty."

Again, despite making the point that he is aware that his behavior is not normal, he chooses to do nothing about it. Soon, he finally finishes the game and so the epilogue begins. This is where the story becomes ambiguous as to where Chipman will end up. Will he grow up and escape the virtual world that has plagued him throughout his life, or will he fully commit to it and suffer for eternity?

"On July 1st of 2012, I officially moved out of the home I’d lived in for 31 years of my life."

This appears to be a positive move for Chipman. He no longer has a reliance on his family and can progress towards independence. However, one could interpret this as a sign of regression, a need to no longer be around humans and live by himself without any opposition towards his escape into Mario’s world. The final words leave the reader with a sense of dread.

"Other boxes yielded more treasures: the SNES, the Nintendo 64, a Dreamcast, the controllers and hookups for all of them, and, yes, my original copy of “Super Mario Bros 3.” [...] The machine still works. The game – in every sense of the word – still works. I am, at last, home."

I do not recommend reading this book.

0/10
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Unread postby James W. » 09 Dec 2014 20:59

I actually thought the title was a joke.

The Future Of AAA Games Is With PC Indie Gameplay Concepts
http://www.reaxxion.com/2841/the-future ... y-concepts

Instead of this:

Grand-Theft-Auto-V_2012_07-12-12_002.jpg


What millions of dollars can do.

PC gamers will get stuff like this:

Galcon-2-Galactic-Conquest-Is-a-Swarming-Strategy-in-Space-466702-7.jpg


What one guy drinking beer and eating pizza can do. (Galcon 2)

When one looks at the two pictures above it is easy to see why AAA games receive most of the attention. They look better, and therefore are perceived to play better. There is more stuff to do in an open, expansive world that GTA 5 provides, versus whatever confusing mix up of colors someone sees with Galcon 2. And yet, as an experienced gaming veteran, you could never convince me to buy GTA 5, even if you gave me the money to do it.

Why is this so? Because GTA’s gameplay is stale. Milking the same damn franchise is really no different than how movie producers continue to make the same old comic book movie slop-fests that have become the norm within the last decade. GTA’s gameplay: Run around a huge world! Kill anyone! Drive vehicles! Shoot guns! …yawn, wake me up when you’re bored, please. Sports games exemplify this gaming degeneracy at it’s finest.


More lols provided by the same guy:

The Best Way to Score a Game
http://www.reaxxion.com/2297/the-best-w ... ore-a-game
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Unread postby Some guy » 10 Dec 2014 16:11

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Unread postby ingolfr » 15 Jan 2015 01:45

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Unread postby shubn » 15 Jan 2015 16:20

http://www.p4rgaming.com/do-we-even-nee ... -industry/

Do We Even Need Video Game Developers in the Gaming Industry?

I see people worshiping streamers, let’s players, reviewers, journalists, but no one ever seems to appreciate the people who make video games. But are they even necessary? The gaming industry would thrive without them if you think about it.

howresponsiblearewe.jpg
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Every day I talk about video games and I find myself talking less and less about those video games. Rather, I like reading about the people who play them and the people who review them. I am attracted to the news about people starting a fundraising campaign for a new video game journalism site or people with opinions talking about that news on a podcast. I enjoy this much more than playing video games and so do a lot of people.

The truth is, video game developers are worthless in today’s gaming industry. They don’t have podcasts or video game sites or YouTube channels, they just make video games. That’s the worst possible thing you could do in this industry. No one is going to care about what a developer does because people would rather pay attention to the people who play the video games they make. So I pose this question, do we even need video game developers?

If all video game developers were to die today, that would just be fine because we already have all the entertainment we could ever want. Gaming podcasts and opinion pieces by video game journalists can still thrive in a world without new video games. Streamers and YouTube gamers already have an endless supply of video games to play and all the people who watch them certainly won’t care if new video games aren’t released as long as those people are still entertaining them.

All these developers should really think about joining this new glorious video game media industry. Video game media is extremely visible and extremely lucrative in today’s market. If you go onto any message board, you’ll see people argue about what their favorite reviewer mentioned or what some person said about how the video game industry is destroying society. And if you do manage to find people talking about video games, it will probably be about sales or reviews. Because when it comes down to it, video games aren’t worth talking about.

I don’t understand who chooses to be a video game developer in today’s gaming industry. It must be suffering to realize that the people who share your vision for video games will be outnumbered by the masses who appreciate true video game art in the form of YouTube parodies and donation streams. People who care about video game developers deserve the same fate as the developers themselves for not embracing what video games have become.
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Unread postby Some guy » 15 Jan 2015 21:08

The Real Problem With That Controversial, Sexy Video Game Sorceress
http://kotaku.com/the-real-problem-with ... -478120280

Jason Schreier wrote:Two weeks ago, I wrote an article that criticized one of the characters in the upcoming game Dragon's Crown. Today, the man behind that character has responded to that article.

On April 12, I published a post titled "Game Developers Really Need To Stop Letting Teenage Boys Design Their Characters." It was a snarky, short article, written to point out that the game's voluptuous, hyper-sexualized sorceress character looks like it came out of the notebook doodles of a teenage, heterosexual male.

"As you can see," I wrote, "the sorceress was designed by a 14-year-old boy."

Today, Dragon's Crown artist George Kamitani—who is not a 14-year-old boy and in fact is the president of Vanillaware, a Japanese developer known for games like Odin Sphere and Muramasa—took to his Facebook page to respond to me.

Here's what he said:

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Unread postby Some guy » 28 Jan 2015 15:52

pewdiepieendorsement.jpg
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Unread postby shubn » 26 Jul 2015 14:05

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Unread postby icycalm » 22 Dec 2016 18:49

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Unread postby El Chaos » 18 Jan 2017 14:00

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Unread postby Some guy » 01 Feb 2017 13:54

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Unread postby icycalm » 04 Feb 2017 22:59

Katana ZERO Official Trailer 2 - Full Confession
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6eaX9nhoW3k
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Unread postby icycalm » 07 Feb 2017 11:16

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